My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
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