Dual....:-)
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize
