Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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