OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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