ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
The Olympian is in my bed
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
