I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
You pole danced in your parka.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
