shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
that's an acceptable place to lick
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
