$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize
