the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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