yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Randomize