butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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