just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
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