Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
Randomize
