I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
pray to the hookup gods
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
