mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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