i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize
