So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
