Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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