She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
