apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Randomize
