Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
the raccoons are back...
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