you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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