i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
My pussy is not your playground.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
