that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
No subtext here. People are naked.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
