Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize
