there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
