is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize
