I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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