how can u be prego again
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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