i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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