based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
