I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
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