Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize