i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Randomize
