Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
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