So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Randomize
