dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
