new low.... made out with someone while peeing
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
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