Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
