the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Randomize
