Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
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