"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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