Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Randomize
