I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
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