Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
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