i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize