I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
My feet surprised me
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
