It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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