Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
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