We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
